


The Worst Thing to Do When You’re About to Die is Lie to Yourself About Having Feelings for Your Coworker

by lovelyavengers (fandomsandxfiles)



Series: From The SSR Case Files [7]
Category: Agent Carter (TV)
Genre: F/M, Huddling For Warmth, Hypothermia, Love Confessions, Mild Peril, Mission Fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-16
Updated: 2020-08-16
Packaged: 2021-03-05 22:14:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,668
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25732672
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fandomsandxfiles/pseuds/lovelyavengers
Summary: A case in New York State leaves the SSR's best agents lost and separated in the dark mountain air.  And to make things worse, it's snowing.
Relationships: Jack Thompson (Marvel)/Reader
Series: From The SSR Case Files [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1809622
Comments: 2
Kudos: 18





	The Worst Thing to Do When You’re About to Die is Lie to Yourself About Having Feelings for Your Coworker

**Author's Note:**

> This was an anonymous request I received on tumblr. it can also be found on my tumblr writing blog, [@fandomsandxfiles-writes](https://fandomsandxfiles-writes.tumblr.com/).
> 
> It is the last of the requests I still have outstanding, but I am working on at least one more Jack Thompson fic for a writing challenge.

The chief was waiting at your desk when you walked in with Peggy one Friday morning, and the two of you exchanged a confused look, because it wasn't like you were late or anything. You racked your brain, coming up with no possible reason that the chief could be mad at you. You heard Daniel walk through the door behind you, and stop as he stared at Jack waiting at your desk too. Your desk was in close proximity to both Peggy's and Daniel's desks, and you would consider them your closest work friends. "Can we help you?" Peggy asked Jack, confused. 

"Yeah, you three, in my office," he said. "We have a case." 

"And you need all of us?" Daniel asked as you filed into Jack's office. You and Peggy sat down in the chairs across from his desk, but Daniel stood by the door after he closed it. 

"Yeah, get with the program Sousa," Jack said, passing you a file from across his desk. "We got intel of a possible HYDRA base in New York State. Apparently, the FBI Field Office out in Albany is stretched too thin to actually work the case, so it got dumped on us. And unfortunately for you three, I trust you morons the most, so pack your bags because we leave for Albany bright and early tomorrow morning." 

You all nodded and stepped out of Jack's office with Peggy and Daniel. "What do you think this is about?" you whispered to Peggy. 

"I have no idea," she said, shaking her head. "I don't know why all of us need to go, but I'm not in the mood to argue with him about it."

You agreed and headed back to your desk. You didn't interact that much with the chief, but you liked him well enough, as he was one of the only people in the office (other than Peggy and Daniel) who didn't treat you like a secretary when you were actually an agent. He was cute too, but you kept that observation to yourself. You didn't want the other agents finding out and making fun of you, or using it to say that you didn't deserve to be an agent because your feelings and emotions cloud your judgement (which they don't). 

It struck you later that he said he trusted you though. You could understand why he trusted Peggy and Daniel, because you knew they had been through a lot together, but you were still a fairly new hire. Trying not to think about it too much, you started to get to work. You had a mission tomorrow after all. 

***

You arrived at the SSR bright and early the next morning, bag packed and ready to go. January was cold enough in New York, but you knew Albany was colder, so you came prepared, maybe a little bit too much. When you walked into the bullpen, it was empty. The SSR rarely had Saturday shifts to begin with, mostly because Jack was a bit of a workaholic and came in most weekend days as well as all week. If something really bad happened, he'd call people in, but so far the world has been safe on the weekends. You didn't expect to be the first person to arrive, so you left your bag by the door and walked over to the chief's office. Slowly opening the door, you stared at the desk and slowly tiptoed over to the chair. 

In a moment of weakness, you decided to sit down in Jack's chair. It was really comfortable. You sat up straighter and looked out the window at the empty bullpen. "Chief Y/N L/N," you said proudly, imagining what it would be like. 

You were too lost in your own imagination to hear someone clear their throat. "Enjoying yourself there Y/N?" 

Your head shot up to see the chief standing in the doorway, eyebrows raised as he stared at you sitting at his desk. You eyes widened in shock and you jumped up out of the chair. "Chief! I'm so sorry! I was- I was just-" you stuttered out. 

Jack laughed at you. "Y/N, it's fine," he said as he smiled. "Don't worry about it." 

"No, I'm sorry chief," you insisted. 

"Jack. Call me Jack," he said suddenly. "You going on this mission with us because I trust you, and it's a Saturday in an empty office. I think you can drop the formalities." 

Your heart swelled with pride at his words. The fact that he trusted you enough to take you on a mission with him was a huge compliment. "Alright," you finally said. "Jack."

He flashed you a blinding smile, but you only got a glimpse of it. Peggy and Daniel had just come clamoring through the bullpen, dragging various bags and things with them. You and Jack quickly walked over towards them. "Good morning," Peggy said brightly, while Daniel just nodded. You could tell he wasn't really a morning person. 

You all sat down around Peggy's desk before you left for the FBI field office in Albany, running through the file and passing around important information. The best the FBI could figure, there was a group operating deep in the mountains. It was hard to tell who it was, but you knew it wasn't good, because there was no register of any United States labs, agencies, or operations in that area other than the FBI field office. And the FBI didn't know what to do about it, so they sent it over to Jack at the SSR. 

***

You all loaded yourselves into a black SSR sedan, barely fitting everyone's bags in the trunk. Jack drove, and Peggy hopped in the front seat, leaving you and Daniel in the back. The drive was mostly silent, mainly because it was too early for any of you to really function. 

About halfway through the drive, Jack pulled into the parking lot of a small diner and parked. "Can I interest you all in a company paid breakfast?" he asked jokingly. 

Daniel, who had dozed off in the backseat next to you, awoke as the car stopped. "I could eat," he said. "I'd kill for some coffee too."

The place was quiet when you walked in. Two other tables were occupied, but that was it. The four of you selected a table out of earshot of the other patrons, and sat down. A few moments later, a bubbly waitress made her way over to you. "What can I get you folks to drink this morning?" she asked brightly. 

You, Peggy, Daniel, and Jack looked at each other, somehow knowing what everyone were thinking. "Four coffees please," Peggy said, smiling at the waitress. She nodded and brought out four mugs, along with containers for milk and sugar. 

Seconds later, you all had steaming cups of coffee in front of you. You found out that Jack drinks his coffee black with a little bit of sugar, Peggy drinks hers with both milk and sugar, and that Daniel prefers just a splash of milk. The waitress returned and you gave your breakfast orders, but soon left the four of you alone again. "What are we going to do when we get into Albany?" Daniel asked as he sipped his coffee. 

"I have a contact at the Albany field office," Jack said. "We'll stop there to pick up their official case files on the matter and speak to the Special Agent in Charge, but after that it's up to us what we do. I don't think the bureau will be much help to us on this."

"Do I detect a hint of annoyance there Jack?" Daniel asked. 

"I think you might still be a little sore when the FBI came in and took credit for capturing Dottie Underwood," Peggy said with a smile. 

"I'm not still sore!" Jack protested, but his tone differed from his words. "I'm just saying that if the FBI had made any real headway on this case, they wouldn't have needed to bring us in on it." 

"I guess," you said. "But isn't this what the SSR is known for among the intelligence community? Strange cases, international espionage, things that don't make sense?" 

"I heard the FBI opened up a division in the DC office for stuff like that," Daniel said. 

"Yeah but that division's not going anywhere," Jack said. "Sometimes there's a reason that unsolved cases are that way, because there's no way to solve them." 

The rest of the time you spent at the diner was spent eating and talking about things that weren't the possibility of a Nazi organization on American soil. And after what felt like seconds, it was time to get back on the road, because you were only halfway done with the trek to Albany. "When we get to the FBI office, can we not mention the fact that Jack thinks they're useless?" Daniel asked, smiling as he got in the backseat of the car. 

"I didn't say they were useless!" came Jack's voice from the driver's seat.

"I think that's a good idea," you laughed. 

***

You didn't want to diss another intelligence agency, but you were starting to see why Jack wasn't holding out much hope for the FBI. The Albany field office was small and cramped, the phones were ringing almost constantly, and the agents were all hunched over their desks. You knew immediately that they needed more agents to help shoulder the amount of cases that were coming through the office. You were quickly given what little information they already had about the case and then waved out. "What do we do now?" you asked.

"I guess go check in to the motel," Peggy said. "We can regroup there and look over the new files they gave us." 

So that's where you were now, gathered in Jack's motel room, sprawled out on different surfaces and looking through case and evidence files. Most of the day had gone by like this, everyone quiet and combing through evidence. Peggy was sitting on the bed, Daniel and a Jack at the small table, and you were sitting on the room's armchair, reading through surveillance reports from the FBI. Every so often you would let out a breath, or someone would shuffle their feet, but otherwise the room was silent. 

Until Peggy had an epiphany. "I think I know where the base is." 

"Marge, how on earth can you be so sure?" Jack was skeptical. 

"All the evidence reports that the FBI gave us - they all seem to triangulate in one area of the mountains," she said, getting up. 

"Wait Peggy you're right," you said, looking back through the reports you had gone through. "All of the eyewitness reports I have seem to confirm the same location. I can't believe I didn't notice this before." 

"Daniel, can I see the map of the area?" Peggy asked. "Y/N, can you give me the average of your coordinates?" 

"Yeah," you said, turning back to your files. Once you gave her the numbers, she marked them off with a pen and turned to her own stack of reports. When she stepped back from the map, you could see an area of the mountains that Peggy had marked off. 

"If we want the best chance of finding that base and not dying in the woods, that's where we need to look," Peggy said. 

"Alright," Jack said, getting up and walking over to his bag. "Let's head out then." 

"Now?" Daniel said, eyebrows raised. "But it's almost dark Jack, and it's going to be cold. It was snowing when we drove back from the FBI office, it's going to be much worse up in the mountains." 

"Sousa it's going to be cold and snowy no matter when we go, it's January for pete's sake," Jack said. "We don't live in California. And the darkness will give us better cover. We're only confirming the location of the base, we're not storming it, so if we get this done now we can drive back tomorrow morning."

"I'm more worried about one of us getting lost," Daniel said. "We don't know these woods to begin with, and they're going to be difficult to navigate in the dark, and even worse if there's snow." 

"We'll have the radios, and as long as we stay together it should be fine," Jack said. "It's more important that we aren't spotted and we don't jeopardize this whole mission."

Daniel looked over towards you and Peggy for help. You held your hands up and stepped back. "I'm not getting involved in this." 

Peggy sighed. "As much as I don't want to say this, Jack's right Daniel. As long as we're diligent and stick together, I think we'll be okay, but I'd much rather use the night to our advantage rather than scout in plain daylight and risk being seen."

"What do you mean 'as much as you don't want to say this?'" Jack said, raising his eyebrows at Peggy. 

"Oh shut up," Peggy answered. "Don't we have a HYDRA base to find?" 

***

Thankfully, HYDRA chose to put their top-secret base in an area with a network of trails, so you weren't in that much danger of running into things. Snow continued to fall as you walked deeper into the woods, and it would have been beautiful, if you weren't there to find a top secret Nazi science base. You all had packed small flashlights from the SSR, and everyone had a radio to communicate in case they got separated from the others. It looked like everything was going to go to plan. 

Until suddenly everything went horribly wrong. 

It started when you and Jack separated from Peggy and Daniel. You were coming closer to the area where you thought the base was, and you split at a fork in the trails to try and get the best view. You and Jack continued silently on the trail, watching the light from Peggy and Daniel's flashlights get further away. It wasn't supposed to be dangerous, it just made the most sense to get a view from several sides. 

Then the gunshots rang out. 

You immediately took off running into the woods, and Jack did the same. You didn't look anywhere but ahead of you, practically hurdling over sticks and tree stumps. You must have been going in the right direction if someone was shooting at you. When you finally couldn't run anymore, you stood behind a tree and panted. You hoped that the others were okay, and looked around, realizing that you had no idea where you were. 

***

Jack was having an arguably worse time than anyone else on the mission. After he heard the gunshots, he saw you take off running into the woods and his instincts took over, so he ran too. Soon he couldn't see or hear you anymore, and he was completely alone. But he didn't have the time to think about the consequences of that, because he fell into a snowdrift. And to makes things worse, he hit his head on a rock that was hidden by the accumulating snow, which knocked him out. 

When he came to again, he was laying on the cold, wet ground and snow was falling on his face. He must have been out for more than a few minutes, but he had no idea how much time had passed. And he was getting colder. When he pulled himself up a little more, he realized that he was now sitting at the bottom of a small hill on all sides. Trees were all around him, their roots weaved together to create a wall he couldn't climb in his state. And he had no idea where he was in relation to the trail or the others. He reached for his radio, only to find it missing. Jack let out a heaving sigh. He was stuck. And all he could do was wait and hope that one of you would stumble upon him, or come looking for him. 

But so far, that wasn't going so well. He didn't know how long it had been, but he hadn't even heard footsteps in his general area. He was getting colder and colder, and before he knew it it he was starting to shiver. The snow just kept falling. 

He stayed still, listening for any sign of movement. He knew both yours and Peggy's footstep patterns, and it was pretty easy to tell when Sousa was walking near him because of his crutch, but he heard nothing. The only good part about hearing nothing was that there were no more gunshots, so he hoped everyone was alright. He thought about the mission, eventually deciding that he should have listened to Sousa and gone out to scout the base in the morning. 

***

You were combing the woods, looking for any sign of Jack, Peggy, or Daniel. You didn't want to try to radio just in case they were being followed by HYDRA, but you had no idea what to do. You didn't know where you were, your only goal had been to get away from the gunshots. Now you were seemingly safe from the guns, but not from nature and the elements. You knew you had to find the others soon, or you would develop hypothermia and die out in the cold. You kept moving, hoping your body heat was enough to keep it at bay for now. 

It was an accident that you found Jack. You were walking through the woods when you heard a weak groan not too far from you. It didn't even register as anything at first, and you brushed it off thinking it was an animal. Then you heard it again and realized what - or who - it was. "Jack!" you said, speaking to seemingly nothing. "Jack!" 

"Down here!" you heard him say faintly, and you looked around to where he could be talking about. It was then when you noticed a snowdrift that hid a grove of trees. Taking a few cautious steps closer, you looked over the edge of the snowdrift to see Jack laying in the snow. "Are the others with you?" 

"No," you said. "I was looking for you and them. Do you know what happened?" 

"I think they were warning shots," Jack said weakly. "But that's enough to confirm that there's something here people want to hide." 

He was starting to slur his words ever-so-slightly, and you knew that wasn't good. If he had been laying in that snowdrift since you separated, the cold ground was not doing him any favors. "Jack, you need to get out of there," you said. "Can you stand up?" 

You saw him attempt to get up, but with no avail. You guessed that he had hypothermia from being stuck in the snowdrift, and you weren't sure what to do. Without thinking, you made your way down to where he was laying and sat down, using your strength to pull him close to you. 

When your brain actually registered what was going on, you were embarrassed. Really embarrassed. Here you were, sitting in a snowdrift in the dark, in the middle of the woods, practically cuddling your boss. You hoped to god that Jack either wouldn't remember this experience at all (you knew that hypothermia occasionally could cause memory loss) or he would at least be understanding to you and allow you to find a new intelligence agency to work at. 

Grabbing your radio, you tried to contact Peggy and Daniel, hoping they were okay. But the cold and the snow got to it, so now you had no way of getting in touch with them, and no way of knowing where you were. And Jack was going to need medical attention, and he needed it soon. He was thankfully still conscious, but if you didn't find Peggy and Daniel eventually, that might not be the case. You pulled Jack closer to you, trying to transfer as much of your body heat to him as possible. He managed to weakly put his arms around you, and you could feel him shivering. Maybe if you weren't about to die in a snowdrift in the middle of the night, you would have allowed yourself to care for him, in a way more than an employee cares for a boss, or a friend cares for a friend. But right now your brain couldn't think about that. Your only priority was to keep him alive, in any way you could. 

More time passed, and it was getting colder. Jack had fallen unconscious a little while ago, despite everything you tried to keep him awake, and it was taking a toll on you. You were starting to feel the effects of hypothermia as well, and you fought it as long as you could. But you couldn't hold nature off forever, and soon you slipped out of consciousness as well.

***

You woke up to bright lights and a feeling of warmth. Blinking your eyes open, you realized that you were laying in a hospital bed, and that Peggy was asleep on a chair across the room. "Peggy," you said, your voice quiet. 

She jerked awake and jumped out of the chair. "Y/N! How are you feeling?" 

"What happened?" you asked, mind still fuzzy. 

"Daniel and I stumbled upon you and Jack in the snowdrift, half dead," she said softly. "Thankfully we were able to get word to the FBI and they sent medical help for the two of you. We're at the hospital in Albany, you've been out for about a day." 

"Is Jack okay?" you asked, disregarding the fact that you'd been unconscious for a day. 

"As far as I know, he's hasn't woken up yet, but Daniel's with him. He was a lot worse off than you were." 

Before you could respond, a nurse entered the room and shooed Peggy away. Once she was done fussing over you, you were told that you would have to stay in the hospital for at least another day, just as a precaution, but you didn't have to stay in bed if you didn't want to. Peggy had brought your bag from the motel, so you quickly got dressed and set out to find Daniel and visit Jack. 

You found Daniel sitting in a chair across from the bed, staring out the window. "Y/N!" he said when you walked in. "How are you feeling?" 

"Better, but they're keeping me in the hospital overnight just to make sure," you said. "How's Jack?" 

"He's not doing as well as you, they don't think he'll wake up for at least another day or so. His case was a lot more serious than yours." 

"I think the hypothermia had already set in when I found him," you said. "We were separated by some gunshots, and when I found him, he had fallen into a snowdrift. He didn't have the strength to get up." 

"So you jumped in and helped him," Daniel said. "When Peggy and I found you, you were both out cold, but you were huddled together." 

"I didn't know what else to do," you said quietly. "I just hope that when he wakes up he doesn't feel weird about it, or he hates me." 

"Y/N, stop worrying about it. You practically saved his life, I'm sure he'll appreciate that. And you didn't hear it from me, but I think his feelings towards you are the exact opposite of hate." 

"Daniel that's ridiculous," you said, shocked. 

"I don't think it is Y/N," he said. "When he told us about this mission, he told us that he trusts us the most out of the office. And I've seen some lingering looks between you two during general meetings." 

You looked away in embarrassment. "No, Daniel-" you started to say. 

"It's fine Y/N," he laughed. "I think you two would be cute together." 

"What if he heard you say that?" you hissed. 

"Then maybe he'd actually wake up so he could tell you himself," was his answer, and then he left the room.

***

You didn't know what else to do but sit in the chair that Daniel used to occupy, stare out the window, and hope that Jack woke up before the nurses showed up to drag you back to your own room. After about an hour, you heard Jack stir and turned to the bed. 

He was awake and staring at you in confusion, no doubt wondering where he was and how he got out of the snowdrift. "What happened?" he asked quietly. "Where are we?" 

"Hospital in Albany," you said. "Peggy and Daniel found us in the snowdrift and managed to get in contact with the FBI field office, who then sent medical help. We both had hypothermia from the cold and the snow, I woke up a little while ago, but your case was a lot worse than mine." 

"Where's Carter and Sousa?" 

"That's a really good question," you said. "Daniel was here a little while ago, and I saw Peggy when I woke up, but I don't know where they are now." 

"Some friends they are," Jack huffed, but you knew he was kidding. "We almost died and they're nowhere to be found." 

You laughed brightly. "They could be negotiating our release," you said. 

"Our release? What are we, in jail?"

"Well I don't know about you, but I don't think I need to stay here any longer. The hospital wants to keep me here overnight though." 

"They still think I'm passed out though," Jack said. "You think they're making my funeral arrangements?" 

"Jack!" you chided. "Your hypothermia wasn't _that_ bad!"

"No it wasn't, because of you," he said. "You saved my life Y/N." 

You didn't know what to say. "It's nothing," you said nervously. 

"Not it's not nothing," he insisted. "I would have died if you hadn't helped me. And it's my fault that you got hypothermia too." 

"No, it's not your fault," you said. "There's no way we could have predicted what was going to happen out there, and-" 

"I love you," he said, completely out of the blue. 

You nearly fell over. "I'm sorry?" 

"I love you Y/N, and I need you to know that," he said, looking you in the eyes. "You don't need to love me back, but when you were holding me in that snowbank I realized that I needed to tell you. So I told myself if we actually survived after that, I'd tell you how I felt the next chance I got."

"Jack-" you said, not sure what to do.

"Every second I spend with you is better than the last," he said earnestly. "Your smile lights up the room, and you make the cutest face when you're embarrassed. I've loved you for a while but I never said anything because I didn't want you to think that the only reason I hired you was because I liked you. I trust you completely, that's why I asked you to come on this mission with us." 

Against all better judgement, you blurted out "I love you too." 

"Are you sure?" he asked. "Because I don't want to force-" 

"No, I'm serious," you said, walking over to stand directly next to his bed. "I also felt something towards you for a while, but when I found you shivering in that snowdrift it all just clicked for me. I don't think I could forgive myself if you died out there and I didn't."

He reached out and grasped your hand. "Are you serious?" 

"Of course Jack."

"Come on," he said, moving himself over towards the other side of the bed. "I want to cuddle with you and not have to fear for our lives." 

You smiled and obliged, climbing into bed next to him. That's how Peggy and Daniel found you two when they walked into the room, arms around each other and fast asleep. 

_\- the end -_

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!
> 
> want to request your own Jack Thompson/Reader one shot?
> 
> You can find the link to the information post [here!](https://fandomsandxfiles-writes.tumblr.com/post/619198264196120576/fic-requests-as-of-right-now-im-taking-fic)


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